Resolution 3 - Start Seeing Someone - Epic Fail (Most Likely)

This has been another blog I have not been looking forward to writing up, but I kept telling myself I am not holding anything back so here goes. It has been five years since the last girl I saw, and it would be a stretch to call it a relationship, we went on a few dates over the course of a month and that was it. I have lost track how many times I have heard from countless friends and family to get a girlfriend. They are 100% right, but for them to understand my position and why it is so difficult for me to make that change....well, I will now try put it into the right words.

I only have myself to blame because I am unbelievably shy and bashful when it comes to the dating game. There is a big part of me inside that really wants to start seeing someone again, and that is why I put this resolution on the list in high hopes that it would help provide me with that drive to overcome my worst fears. Those fears are another part of me that is a incredibly hard to overcome force that is absolutely petrified of turning into the same people I promised myself not to become and being an awful burden on a special someone. If I somehow manage to hurt someone the same way I saw many family and friends get hurt coming out of relationships, then I just do not know how I could have that on my conscience.

In the end I always like to go with my gut feeling, and my gut tells me that one day I will meet that girl where we will be perfect for each other, but I have no idea when that day will occur. Could be within a week or two to sneak in this resolution before the chime of the new year, or it could very well be a couple months, years or even decades out for all I know. Just getting this out in the open is a huge weight off my back, and now that it is out there for all to consume, well, I will just have to have faith in your judgment of me. Unless something magical happens by the end of the year in the next few weeks, consider this resolution as a big whopping fail.